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a little bit lost and

Apr. 23rd, 2011 | 04:10 am
hearing: On A Good Day - Oceanlab

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(no subject)

Mar. 11th, 2011 | 09:55 pm
feeling: contentcontent
hearing: Bad Romance - Lady Gaga

Hi Livejournal! Wow, I'm just being straight up lazy now. I blame facebook. I hate facebook. Except it helps me find out information about people D: Curse you facebook.

So, what's new with my life? I'm doing a lot better than I was, and I have no clue why. Keith and I broke up, but I am somehow now pulling A's in nearly all of my classes. I'm not sure how this is possible. :| But I have to start worrying about getting a thesis to work on and all that happy fun senior stuff.

Met a new guy recently that I really like, but I don't know him very well. I think I made it fairly obvious that I'm interested in him through my typical stupidity, but I'm pretty happy just getting to know him lately. He's really cool and I seem to have a lot in common with him. Too bad it's his last semester at Oswego. That is forever my luck.

It's spring break time now, and I'm not exactly thrilled to be home. I walked in and it was immediately quite the oppressive atomsphere with my grandma in pain and her and my mom arguing. Awesome. And my mom is upset with Nick, and just... yep. I would really like spring break to happen at school... just... without the school. I wish that were plausible. :|

But tomorrow I get to go grocery shopping with mama and we're going to see the high school's production of Beauty and the Beast :D The disney version! I can't wait <3 But for now, Kaya wants to play League of Legends, so I'm off!

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when it's lovin', it's leanin' towards being alone

Jan. 14th, 2011 | 03:39 am
hearing: Soulgazing - Gregory and the Hawk

oh, livejournal. My life.Collapse )

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it's clouded, what we know

Dec. 23rd, 2010 | 01:50 pm
feeling: okayokay
hearing: Fin Song 8 (orange river remix) - Gregory and the Hawk

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everything that keeps us together is falling apart

Dec. 8th, 2010 | 03:29 pm
hearing: Boats and Birds - Gregory and the Hawk

Well. It's been interesting.

School is really beginning to suck the will to live out of my brain and I've honestly been nothing but miserable since this semester started, and this has been a long time coming. I've always hated school. My only incentive to do well in it was so that I could get the hell out of there faster. I do like to learn and listen to lectures, but that's really the extent of it. I guess it used to be easier to deal with, but now I don't really have anywhere to go that I can really call home to go and get away from everything. It's just constant, and I really can't take it anymore.

I've probably failed this semester of school and I don't think I've felt so good in a long time. I still intend to graduate at some point, but I'm not going to kill myself over doing everything on time anymore. I don't care anymore. All I see every day is people complaining about how much work they have and stressing themselves to the point of sickness. It's not worth it.

Heading to the doctor's with my mom today. I should leave soon, actually. Disappointed in myself for putting this off so long and probably needing pills to be happy. I know there's no shame in it -- lots of people are like that. It just sucks that that's what life is like.

I'm really tired of college. I think it would be better if I lived off of campus -- but living home isn't an option either. I'd like to get an apartment or something, but I don't really feel responsible enough to do that. I'm not sure what to do from here on out or what's going to happen. All I can do for the moment is sit and wait.

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I'm in love with the world

Oct. 14th, 2010 | 08:16 pm
feeling: contentcontent
hearing: Say Yes - Elliott Smith

askjddhafaiuehwfjkjhd I am so bad about updating now. There really isn't much worth mentioning -- I went to Pennsylvania to see Keith a couple weeks ago and it was lovely :D I plan on going again next week. It was a very pretty drive too :D And an easy one, which made mama feel a lot better about me going. I can't wait to see him again, I miss him a lot :\ His wow isn't working -- the 4.0 patch messed it up -- so we haven't been able to do much together other than talk on the phone, which is okay, it's better than nothing, but he's really frustrated about it and wants to play. I can't wait to go visit him again, it's tooooorrrrtuuuuuure. But him being 3 hours away is infinitely better than living in Atlanta ~_~

Was supposed to have a geo camping trip this weekend, but thankfully it got cancelled :D Well, not entirely, but we only have a day trip on Saturday instead of a four day trip. I'm down for that, I'm just glad I had today to do work and sleep instead of spending all day freezing in the pouring rain at outcrops ;_;

Gramma is back in the hospital... I guess she fell down in the middle of the night and she's in a lot of pain. She was disoriented and ended up taking all of her pills instead of just what she needed. So she's back there and apparently she's not coming home this time, she's going to a nursing home. Mama just can't handle taking care of her all the time, she's missed a ton of work just trying to get things situated with gram the past few days. I went to visit after my work was done today and mama showed up shortly after I did, so we kept her company today for a few hours. She's really looking worse for wear, and last time she was in this hospital, they overmedicated her and that caused her a lot of problems :\

Other than that... hrm, well, I found out I got two parking tickets today for parking in an employee parking spot. x_x I parked in a lot that has residential and employee parking, but apparently the particular spot I chose was not for residents, it was one spot away from being residential. If only there was sufficient parking on campus, augh. But I made sure to get a spot in the lot I usually park in when I got back today, and I'm just going to be extra careful from now on. Still, though. So retarded. ugh.

I'm running out of teeeeeeeeea ;_; I need mooooooar, but I don't wanna drive all the way to Carousel to get it! Ack. I shouldn't spend any more money anyways, I just got myself a ghetto little mp3 player. It's 2 gigs for $30 and it works really nicely so far, so I'm quite pleased with the purchase. I intend on eventually getting a better one, but when that happens I told mama she can have this one, since she's too much of a penny pincher to buy herself a $30 one XD I just ordered a new book and a CD on amazon too. I got the new Hilari Bell book because you'd best believe I'm buying her new books the day they come out, and I bought an Elliott Smith CD, which I blame entirely on Keith for introducing me to his music. I can't wait for those to get here :D

That just about sums everything up lately. I'm pretty happy lately, in no small part because of Keith, and it seems like I live my life counting down the days until I get to see him again. Which is fine. He's wonderful, and I love him :D

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you're the yellow bird that I've been waiting for

Sep. 16th, 2010 | 12:00 pm
feeling: lovedloved
hearing: Poison Oak - Bright Eyes

I just realized that i haven't updated this in quite a while. Here's what's up:

- Back at school, it's kind of lonely and boring but that's no different than always
- Met Keith and he's amazing, and we decided to try dating. Tenative plans to see him again on October 1st
- Been playing more wow, mostly with Keith, we got into a friends' guild and we finally have a fun raiding group
- Drama is super gay and I've been avoiding hanging out with most people here because of it (Ash and Ry -- I miss you guys! Mall trip or something sometime? Please?)
- Been dealing with a lot of problems involving Slowbro. I really have no idea what to do -- I'm happy for the first time in a long time, but I can't be entirely happy knowing he's so miserable :\ But he won't talk to me and he won't stop doing stupid stuff... I just don't know what to do. I wish I could help.

I really can't describe how surreal it was to meet Keith. I wasn't nervous driving to the airport to meet him, and when we met it wasn't awkward at all. It was like we'd always known each other. We just -- had a good time together. We went out to eat a couple times, stayed in and watched movies and played WoW together. It was really nice, to be able to just be around him. We were both really happy, the happiest either of us have been in a while. I don't think it's ever felt so natural to be around sometime that, for all intents and purposes, I hardly know. Except I do feel like I know him, and I feel more comfortable around him than most people. He's already seen me make an ass of myself multiple times, and he'd just grin at me and pull me into a hug and tell me not to worry about it. I could go on for days about how wonderful it was to have him here -- but there's really no words to accurately describe it. I'm so happy he's only a few hours away.

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Aug. 13th, 2010 | 02:20 pm
feeling: contentcontent
hearing: Brick by Boring Brick - Paramore

So the guildie from the last entry, Orin (or Keith, rather), is going to be up in the area visit his mom in a month... and he wants to meet up. LOLWUT. It's probably not a good idea but I'm not even really creeped out. It sounds like something I would do. XD So I'm kind of excited and kind of extremely nervous, but I guess we'll see what happens. damn adorable resto druids, they get me every time D:

Got my driver's license too, I guess that's kind of important. Most I've done with it is drive Ash and Ryan to walmart for magic cards and a headset, and I have a feeling all of our future outings will have a very similar flavor.

going to see Scott Pilgrim vs the World prolly tomorrow! Pretty excited to have a reason to get out of the house that I'm actually enthusiastic about

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make some noise!

Aug. 4th, 2010 | 03:15 am
hearing: Professional Party People - Basshunter

So, um. I start playing wow again to enjoy my new compy and I end up joining a new guild. And it's fun yeah and a nice way to get away from RL problems but then I end up with a crush on an officer... Then he friends me on FB and ends up not only being awesome but also epic cute. /facepalm

Well, at the very least I now have a pocket resto druid. XD

That aside, the guild's really nice and I love it. We're trying Ruby Sanctum tomorrow night, I hope it goes well! ICC10 is on Thursday. As a guild they haven't been doing ICC10 very long and only the GL and officers are really geared. well, slowbro is too and I'm better geared than most too. But it's fun! Everyone's pretty cool and it's nice to be in a friendly guild.

Driver's test friday... I'm gonna fail it. I know it. I'm definitely not good enough at driving yet :| but here's to dumb luck.

Not a whole lot going on lately other than wow. Of course now wow ties in with boy problems... I guess it's my own fault but I have no idea how it happened. heeeeeeeeeeeeerp derp

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(no subject)

Jul. 15th, 2010 | 01:56 pm


/sobs silently in the corner

Edit: Mother postponed the trip to next Wednesday. I could not be happier. :D

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